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Even Apple Gets Stung By Bureaucracy

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Image via CrunchBase

As you complete your next TPS report and wallow in the stifling bureaucratic swamp of typical business life, you think… how did it get this way?  How did we lose sight of the customer?  How did a previously innovative organization succumb to the same evil forces it once fought so hard against?

The insidious poison of fear-based, bureaucratic thinking can infect even the most creative companies. Apple, arguably the most disruptive company in the world, is now showing signs of being bitten by that slithering snake. I experienced this first hand on a recent trip to the Apple Store:

Step 1: Walk in with a smile.  Ask to buy an iPhone for each of my kids.  Told there's a 30 min wait to see a "specialist".  I respond with "Cool, I'll be back in 25 min" (I was at a mall).  Next, I’m scolded and told I must wait inside the store.  If I left, I'd lose my appointment. "That's our policy".

Step 2: Finally my name is called and I tell my "specialist" that I want two iPhones.  Chad says, "We must ring them up separately. That's our policy".   He rings up my son’s phone first in a slow and cumbersome process that takes nearly 30 minutes and requires a phone call to someone at Apple for "approval".

Step 3: Time to do the whole thing again for my daughter.  I had to repeat all my info, social security number, driver's license…the whole bit.  At the end of it all, the system informs that Chad must call in for "analyst review".

Step 4: Specialist talks to Verizon.  I'm informed that I need to fax a copy of a utility bill to Verizon (apparently to prove I actually live where I do).  So even though I just bought one phone, I'm apparently now a credit risk.  Keep in mind – I have PERFECT credit.  Never missed a bill, and if they looked a tiny bit deeper they'd probably realize I can afford the $40 per month.  So now I'm told I need to fax some random document to some random person to check some box.  Also now informed I can't get her phone tonight (the equivalent of horror to a 13-year-old girl).

Step 5: I say, “This is insane.  Let me talk to the Verizon person.”  Response: “Sorry, customers are not allowed to speak to them directly.  Policy”.  When noting my frustration, my "specialist" says "Hey… not my problem.  Verizon is a separate company.  I can do nothing".  Funny how I'm buying a phone and service from Apple, but now there is another company's policy that is impacting me and it is "not my problem".

Step 6: I say, "Look… I'm not a credit risk and I just don't have time to fax and come back.  How about I prepay the entire contract?  Then you have zero issues, right?"  Response: "Sorry, our system isn't set up to do that."  This type of nonsense goes on for quite some time, with my completely unhelpful and un-empowered "specialist" providing zero value, help, or reason.

Step 7: Another long bureaucratic issue ensues when they refuse to transfer pictures from my son’s old phone to his new one.  “Legal liability” I’m told.  “What if I sign a waiver?” I ask sheepishly.  “Sorry sir.  Our policy doesn’t allow for that.”  Me: “Are you sure you work for APPLE?!?”

Steve Jobs would have had a heart attack.  What happened to the irreverence?  What happened to “Think Different?”

If this can happen at Apple, the same cancerous thinking can invade your organization.  Your job is to hunt and kill this nonsense.  To constantly challenge conventional thinking.  To shun idiotic policies.  If you’re not the one who cleans this up, your competitor (likely a new startup) will be happy to solve it for you. I’d love to tell you more, but I have to go run this by the legal department and then get approval from the Vice President of Finality.

For more insight on creativity and innovation, visit JoshLinkner.com.